Life Is Like a Box Of Chocolates...

December - no October
It's getting to be that time of year again.  I know, it's only October, but here in the Northeast, it feels more like Christmas and every year I find myself sitting down to watch "It's a Wonderful Life" again.  I have been spending a fair amount of time recently thinking about the rituals of life and of transformation and as my thoughts are drawn to Christmas in amongst it all, I find myself remembering the scene in "It's a Wonderful Life" where the Baileys are dedicating a new home.  Mary and George stand on the porch steps in front of a gaggle of people and present the new homeowners with three gifts:  "Bread - that this house may never know hunger, salt - that life may always have flavor, and wine - that joy and prosperity may reign forever.  Enter the Martini Home!"

The Significance of Ritual
This small ritual showed that the Baileys understood the significance of what this new home meant to the Martinis who had purchased it.  They wanted to set the tone for all that would come in the future of the house by marking it with a ritual.  We use rituals in our lives to mark a variety of significant life moments.  Birth, death, marriage, graduation, retirement, etc.  Why not have a ritual to mark the purchase or sale of a home?

Simplicity in Ritual
A ritual doesn't have to be a big affair like a wedding.  It can be as small as offering three tokens of good will on the steps of a new house.  All it takes is setting some time aside and being clear about what you are offering.  I have seen sellers pass their love for their home on to the new buyers at the closing table.  They stopped signing papers, and drew in the attention of the buyers while they told a story of something they loved about the house.  Then they said "and now the house is yours.  I hope that you love it as much as we did.  I know it will treat you well." and then they passed the keys over.  That is a ritual.

Ideas for Rituals
The purchase or sale of a home is a significant point in anyone's life.  We are in a unique position to create a container to hold that significance by creating a ritual to mark it.  Below I've listed some ideas for ways in which you and your clients can create rituals together. 

• Hold a dedication like the Baileys did - if alcohol is inappropriate, then consider honey - that life may always be sweet or something silly like a smilie face - that these walls may always be filled with laughter.  All you need to do is think of what you would wish for your clients, and then find something to represent that feeling/intention. 
  
• If someone is leaving, consider creating a scrapbook for them with photos of the house, the neighborhood and the neighbors.  Find out where they would go to spend down time and include a photo or an item associated with that place.  Make a big deal out of presenting the scrapbook - not in an ego way, but in a significant way. 
  
• Be there when the sellers are finishing up moving out.  Have them say their final good-byes to the house.  They will often be too busy with moving to remember to do this.  Taking a moment to have them slow down and say goodbye is important.  If they don't know what to say, suggest that they just thank the house for holding them while they lived there. 
  
• When the sellers go to pass the keys across the table to the new buyers, take the keys from them.  Ask them if there are any well-wishes or hopes for the future that they would like to pass to the buyers with the keys.  Get the buyers' attention so that they can receive those wishes.  Leave a space for the buyers to respond and then pass the keys to them.
• If you know that the purchase or sale represents something more to your clients like the freedom to finally start traveling, or the ability to be with grandchildren, or the start of a new life after a divorce, include those things in your ceremony.
• If people are selling one house and moving into another and their old house was a happy one, create a physical container to hold the happiness.  Have them put their happiness from their old home into the container and then carry it to the new house, open the container and put the happiness into the new home.  If they need something more tangible than just "put the happiness in the container", give them strips of paper to write their happy memories on and then put those in the container.  This is a great way to get kids involved in the moving process too.
• If the property had been foreclosed on, you might want to do something to break that pattern so that the new owners come in fresh without fear that they too might lose the house to foreclosure.  Perhaps a gratitude ceremony where they thank the house for finding a way to be affordable for them and then telling the house that they are happy there and asking it to support their staying in the property.

Going Deeper In Relationship
There are many ways to create small but significant rituals for your clients.  By acknowledging that you get the importance of what this move means to them, you deepen your relationship with them and become more than just another Realtor.

Think about it.

Here's a link to a sorority house dedication to give you some additional ideas...

And a description of a traditional Indian house blessing ceremony

And another person's description of the ceremony they did on the one-year anniversary of their home purchase

A House Blessing Book - available on Amazon

The Catholic Epiphany House Blessing Ceremony

And a few pagan ones

That should give you some good ideas...